Girl in the Lotus

another lame country song about love

2009-12-27T06:43:00.000-08:00

you be x's
i'll be o's
we'll play a game of tic tac toe
you go, you're first
my lips are pursed
hold your breath, dive in head first

your x's on my lips is all I need
my o's an oh my God don't make me plead

love is one of those games of tic tac toe
that nobody wins
unless somebody knows
the game
and how to work the grid

and didn't you say that you wanted to play
but you had somewhere to be
at the end of the day
and so
you left, in the midst

of our tic tac toe

Barf Bag Contemplations on a Long Flight "Home"

2009-07-16T17:08:00.000-07:00

forty one thousand and one forty feet
above the land upon which my heart and mind meet
above the street
tracked with divets
she pivots
her flight to the top left
to the far west
to the coast
with the most
to the host shall we toast
this winnipeg rye
at this diner
that serves breakfast all day
and on this bread
we shall spread
this warm packet of marmalade
neon and freckled
with screaming specks of orange zest
like my chest
burnt from the sun
the marshmallow
burnt by the fire
lips dry and jaded
rehydrated
by your kiss
that i already miss
i'm so parched it's pretty
gregariously gritty
i need you to sit me
back and be with me
and kiss me
of course!
what else would we do?
except stand in the parkinglot
and dance to the rythym of cars over there
as the dark sets the air
saturated in her blue evening gown
not complaining, but it's raining
like a broken pepper shaker
cloud's a faker
but i'll take 'er
let's just go back inside
just to hide
from everything that isn't love
we can watch the windshield
and contemplate the rain drops
inconspicuously welling
like the swelling and the tears in my
eyes collecting water
and salt
and reasons i love you
and carrying messages down to my lips
window base
of my face
and it tastes like everything you've ever said
makes my stomach ripple like white rum
drunk straight
up and out of here
face north and turn left
like i left you
but do know i go back
to the mountains
between which your heart got stuck
just your luck
but no fret, not just yet
i shall keep it here safe
and wait
at the gate by the border
that keeps ups apart
like the border i trace round your heart
and mine
for one love we'll be fine
it's just time
we still have the moon
we still have the night
and tonight
this delusion of seperateness dissolves
like sleeping bag seams
and it seems
i'm out of paper?
to write,
just enough room to say good night
and whisper 'i love you'
inside

freshly ground moonbeams

2009-05-31T09:00:00.000-07:00

i'm holding out till night time

till the sun has slipped on her evening gown

till the the town

has shut her eyelids down

like the city skyscrapers close their curtains

till i'm certain

day is distant

till the eve socks all resistance

serupticiously

i wait

but for one delicious taste

of midnight sky

seasoned with stars

and freshly ground moonbeams

and dreams

little dipper

contemplative little sipper

of sedative sleep, slumber, soundly

profoundly, peaceful

restful in this nest

full of pillows plush

no need to rush

to travel a trip into dreamland

but hush

here comes the sandman

hold my hand

let's take the quick sand

we'll get there fine

and here you're mine

we've not much time

in dream less sleep, our sleepless dreams

flow fast like streams

this sacred space

the only place

i can hold you and kiss you

and mold you and miss you

so let's do our best to

hold on

but hold on

say what?

local weather is next? after a word from our sponsors?

blast! i held fast!

but the alarm came at last!

and this morning is a mourning

and suddenly that distinction makes sense to me

(it dawns on me!)

and i'll greet the day with apprehension

timid tension

for it will be hours until we meet, my sweet

till then, i'm holding out till night time

till the moon chases the sun 'neath the mountains

and the fountains of this sleepy town

find the stream to the dream where i kiss you good night

sleep tight

good night

haikus

2009-05-31T08:40:00.000-07:00

come back to my place

we'll have ice cream for dinner

and we will all melt

(above: sara and me on the way home from the beach. we had ice cream AFTER dinner on granville island with james. yay summer!)

breakfast ballad

2009-05-19T08:51:00.000-07:00

morning comes
my soul awakes
my bowl of flakes
awaits me
the soy pours like the milky way
like a saturated moon sponge squeezed
i'm pleased
with ease, like running fingers up a piano
*run fingers up piano here*
my spoon hits the bowl, sings in soprano
*ding*
i'm ravenous
so i'm havin this
spoonful right now
my stomach smiles
for she's walked miles
pacing through my dreams
a coffee with two creams
dances on my tongue
smooth seductress
toothsome temptress
and the fruits on my plate
kiss my pallatte
this fruit salad
is a ballad
of emotions and notions and symphonic potions
conducted by my fork and straw
this edible orchestra
is harmony
far from being
dissonant
even with the innocent baby mandarin
(who is speaking mandarin at that!)
singing brighter, sweeter, happy-higher
than the choir
alto apple
is an ample sample
ambidexterous ability
of humerous humility
while the mango does the tango on my tongue
the fun's not done
there's still a ton
and I can't stop her
swimming through this ball popper
of giddy grapes
this melon is a felon of my taste
*rrrrrrrrrrrrring*
there goes the school bell
best make haste
tralalalalalalala

2009-05-03T21:29:00.000-07:00

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me
(i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it
(anywherei go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)
i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

ee cummings

lover for the day

2008-05-30T19:37:00.000-07:00

sitting on the garden gate
hot sun on my face, i wait
cool breeze blowing
at my back
softly knowing what i lack
reminder
your warmth comes only with the sun
a love that's young
and then it's done
won't stay the night
setting beneath the horizon
letting me feast my eyes on
the moon
too soon
i have yet to gather warmth for tonight
cold when you're gone
so long
i curl myself up - face into heart
i breathe where it's dark
and though it's late
i'm still awake
and i make
pictures - designing dreams
of what i want with you
to have you stay
warming rays
my lover for the day

dancing

2008-05-30T19:34:00.000-07:00

dizzy dancing everywhere

here and there

i can hardly stay in one place

my face is flushed

my mind is mushed

my heart is gushed

and there's either an earthquake

or i'm vibrating

this energy - new

i get it from you

i'm so high

i could die

this moment, and still smile

and a mile past that moment

i last saw your eyes

i'm still buzing

still all fuzzy

getting dizzy

keeping busy

so i won't have time to miss you

that june afternoon with you

2008-05-30T19:31:00.000-07:00

The summer sun takes me back

to that June afternoon with you

nothing to do

me and you, and two spoons

bought a liter of sherbert

and put on some tunes

spice girls and pop songs

we ate on your lawn

till the ice cream was gone

then danced in the sun - sugar high

we touched the sky

you made cartwheels

while I made angels in the grass

we got heat rash

and freckles on our faces

undone shoeless

barefoot and beautiful

perennially young

forever in fun

two girls and a sun

together

inevitable, the sun set that night

and without a fight

we let her retire

tired, we lay on a cotton quilt

cool air soothing our burnt faces

like aloe

the sound of cars

the twinkling stars

the light of the summer moon

takes me back

to that june afternoon, with you

by your smile

2008-05-30T19:25:00.000-07:00

The times I think of you
(which is all of the time)
I'm inspired to write it all down
but I just frown, as my head drowns
with all of these feelings.
and somewhere betweeen my head and my hand -
something gets lost
the poem falls apart
in my overwhelmed heart
I can't even start, to organize my thoughts
I'm mesmerised, and hot
for you - it's true - so why do
I worry what's written
I'm smitten
by your smile.
A while ago
when I met you, it started
I saw you - eyes darted - I felt my heart guarded
but I melted those gates,
me and three of the fates,
i was just washing plates,
when I felt it
couldn;t help it
now a glutton in verse
like my button-y purse
there's a mess in my mind about you
it's true- so why do
I worry what's written
I'm smitten
by your smile
:)

About You

2008-05-30T19:17:00.000-07:00

What is it about you
that makes me forget how to talk?
I develop a stutter,
my lips made of butter
as I mutter,
'hello'
and i go to the cooler
to let the cool air
chill my red face
let my head race
with thoughts of
who am i kidding?
what was I didding? - er - doing?
..I'm ruining this, aren't I?
What is it about you
that makes me forget what to say?
The water's okay,
so I dip my toe in,
you say, 'how's it goin?'
now i'm 'i-don't-know'n
pie-eyed, and petrified,
i tail it away from the tide.
why- tell me why-
I get so clumsy.
my fingers are flumsy
I'm spilling things all over
and i race, and with the same grace,
scramble to pick them up - to save face
What is it about you
that makes me forget what to do?
my cue- was it my turn already?
so unsteady, I can hardly stand
to look you in the eyes.
I do, and to my surprise,
you're smilin'
all the while an'
you say I'm kind of cute
Im mute - and i blush- and i rush to say
'shush' - you say
As you lean in to kiss my cheek
my knees are weak
my eyes leak
one tear.
what is it about you,
when you're near,
that makes me fear,
that ill never feel this way again?

As I Am - a teenage love poem

2008-04-15T07:30:00.000-07:00

I like you.

Let's get that out of the way,

but before I continue,

there's a few things I need to say.

I like bread ends and trailmix,

and buttercup squash.

I say, 'oh my gosh',

and i wash

my laundry

when i run out of socks.
My hair is a mess

and i guess it's because it's been under a hat all day.

quite a dissarray, I'd say.
'cause i work in a kitchen,

so i can get by.

and i smell like a fry,

or a pizza...

... i hope you like pizza.

I check my horoscope every morning,

because I'm a scorpio,

and we're myseterious like that.

and i have a cat,

though she's really quite annoying.

so, i hope you're allergic, and we can go to your place instead and

...make out, or something.

I'm not too good with these feelings,

though I have a lot.

I just thought

I might have a shot

with you.

And I'm not much of a poet.

would ya know it?

and for me to show it - my truth - is hard

uncouth, and scarred.

and not just these stitches on my chin,

but the scars within.

i just want you to know,

that i'm slow, at this, thing, whatever it is.

but i do what i can,

not for you, nor for them;

for me.

do you take me as i am?

Bus Song

2008-04-15T07:26:00.000-07:00

The guy in the blue jeans
taps his shoe to beat
his feet
know a rythym of their own
a tone
in a silent song
and the man to my right strums along
a guitar made of air
not a care
who might stare
but nobody is looking anyway
for they're involved
and dissolved
in their phone
a ringtone
and music they own
or stole
but regardless, is it heartless
to draw oneself in away from the drain of this world
a sewer
quite fewer
are those who swim through it
it's deep, dark and dirty, but don't...
oh won't you join me?
no cell phones, or ipods or color tv,
for you see, you and me,
them and we,
have a sound of our own.
a tone
that alone
- - is silence - -
but with the world along,
is a beautiful song.

A Bird Story

2008-04-05T07:49:00.001-07:00

lonely bird
perched upon the traffic light
green, yellow, red
you wait...
anticipate...
you might, take flight, green light
and with a flap of your two strong wings
you start to soar,
more and more.
lonely bird,
what are you lookng for?
high above the power lines,
past ivy vines,
and gold wind chimes,
you fliy
but why? lonely bird, why?
alone you be,
though i can see,
a vee, of birds like you.
why don't you go,
to join the flow,
and make bird friends out of crows?
and from a mile,
i watch a while,
and smile, at your small speck in the sky.

and i know why, you fly,

and i know why, you sing

i hear your tune,
as you rise high noon,
you have friends, lonely bird
the sun, the stars and the moon

lonely bird, soar more and more,
i hope you find what you're looking for.

Bus Ride - Occupied

2007-11-14T09:22:00.000-08:00

Occupied
When you read your book,
Your eyes are occupied.
When you stuff your ears with headphones,
Your ears are occupied.
When you clench your bag,
Your hands are occupied,
And with this business,
Your mind follows right along.
And what for your soul?
When you free your body from doing,
No fear,
For you can shut your eyes, hold your elbows,
And hide;
Shutting doors, guarding gateways.
How truly frightening it is
To be open and tender;
To consume the world and
Absorb the life that perpetually sprials through,
And around, and above, and in you.
But how profoundly liberating
and exhillarating it can be
To let go.

Starfish

2007-11-14T09:17:00.000-08:00

Starfish
Reaching, bending,
Soft extending,
My arms explore the world.
Touching, tasting,
Interlacing
Limbs to make them curl.
So brilliant
And resillant,
Peeling, feeling, at last healing.
I do not fear,
For I know I'm here
to stay, the day, is all I am sure.
It's pure -
this life-
I reach, I bend
And softly extend -
Explore the more -
is all.
I touch, I taste,
And interlace.
I am life;
Starfish.

2007-07-26T20:47:00.000-07:00

Goosebump-glazed, so frore it's sore
Drawn to the door
The sun melts, and her skin, like a sponge
Swells with every ray